absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
