The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
The power of my boobs compel you
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
