also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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