big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
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