I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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