Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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