I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You can't just leave with hair like that
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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