A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
her vagine was all disorganized.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
