i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
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Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
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I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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