I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
