opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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