Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
