im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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