Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
