There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
