This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
