Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
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