So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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