I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
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I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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