It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
