there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
