i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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