so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
