I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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