Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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