I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm at about main and main street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize