i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize