That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
