Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize