Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
