My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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