I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
