Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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