After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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