I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
