butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
