Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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