some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize