Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
