We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
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He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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