Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
