Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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