just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
They have beer where we have blood.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize