How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
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I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
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