You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
