I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
