Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
