I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
