He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
