this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
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Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in