I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whose ass print is on the piano?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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